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Tag: intention

Two factors to measure success

How do you measure your success, is is the numbers in your bank account, your title at the firm, the number of clients you land in a month? In this moment, do you consider yourself a failure? Or would you describe yourself as a success?

I have written about how we define and measure success and have asked monks and entrepreneurs and academics what they think. So much of our unhappiness stems from comparison and self-worth — I don’t have a house like she does, look at the wife he has, she was promoted so quickly, he’s making six-figures and I’m stuck at five.

It is easier to see the missing pieces. Thoughts about what we do not posses overtake contemplations about what we do. It takes concentration to remember the places from which you came, the lessons learned along the way, the growth that took years and months to master. Ignore the numbers, as Howard Schultz (Starbucks) realized. Happiness is a fluctuating bar.

I’d like to propose a new method of measuring success. Two factors, actually:

1.) Progress.
2.) Satisfaction.

Progress can be measured by revisiting your starting point. Have you moved forward? Has your company/relationship/personal trait improved by some degree?

Satisfaction is felt and requires some honesty on your part. Do you have a sense of accomplishment or reward at the end of the day? Can you look in the mirror with contentment? With pride?

Progress and/or satisfaction.

If you can claim one of these two characteristics, you are a success. If you have both progress AND satisfaction, you are in an excellent position. Keep going.

Are you making a difference to one person?
Are you doing work honestly and with passion?
Are you focused on integrity and vision?
Are you pleased with your efforts?
Are you able to show up day in and day out?

The root of unhappiness lies in your definition of success. It’s worth revisiting what and who you think is successful and why. Maybe you are, too.

“What took you the longest to learn?”

Oprah asks her guests this question on her Super Soul podcasts. A thoughtful pause follows, and the answer is often a mix of wistfulness, courage, sometimes even regret.

How would you answer the same question?
What lesson has taken you the longest to learn?

Recognizing distance

We often consider how far we have to left to go.
Three more days until holiday.
$10,000 to hit our fundraiser.
Two terms left in the fiscal year.
Four more miles in this run.
Six credits to meet requirements.
Yet how often do we measure and appreciate the distance we’ve traveled?
Let the ground you’ve already covered fuel you.

Rest days

Athletes and bodybuilders know that taking rest days helps muscles recover. In fact, days of rest are seen as equally powerful as training days — necessary to increase strength and endurance. These “off days” are scheduled into physical training regimens.

Rest days aren’t just for the body; they are important for the mind. Days away from training and routine refresh the psyche and prevent burnout.

Whether or not you’re an athlete, your creativity and ability to plan is enhanced by taking days off. Sleep in, go for a leisure walk, schedule a massage, or pick up a good book.

Schedule at least one rest day each week and allow yourself to enjoy.

The unusual gift of fear

If you feel afraid, there’s a good chance something big is about to happen. You have a choice: run away or step towards it.

With fear resting on one side of the scale, desire to change sits on the other. Either you desperately want something different or a situation has become so unpleasant it leaves no other possible choice. If you let fear win, you may find yourself in the same position next year, or even five years down the line.

Fear forces you to prepare and plan, to collect information, and to consider possible outcomes. But giving too much power to fear welcomes anxiety, lets the mind to travel to far too distant places, and distorts your perspective. From an evolutionary perspective, fear triggers fight or flight. Your heart rate quickens, breathing becomes shallow, and your vision narrows. Unknown situations and unfamiliar circumstances trigger the responses our ancestors once had at the hiss of a snake or bear or enemy.

Each time you embrace fear, you become stronger. The spaces fear once lingered become smaller, and in time, you’ll have so much light that only a small shadow is cast. The next time fear creeps into shadowy places, you’ll know how to cope.

Recognize fear for what it is. Write down all of the possible situations that might occur — the mistakes you’re afraid of, the “maybes” that might happen, the potential disasters (yes, even the ludicrous ones), your fears of success.

Then get ready to act. Committing to a decision will increase your confidence, and fear will be the one that begins to tremble.

Breathe deep and go.

24 ways to hit reset

1. Take a walk around the block.
2. Sit in the park.
3. Pick up a book you’ve been meaning to finish.
4. Play a favorite song.
5. Google photos of your next vacation spot.
6. Find a new route home.
7. Order take out.
8. Have lunch at a nearby hotel.
9. Surprise a friend.
10. Buy flowers.
11. Color with markers.
12. Set an alarm for a twenty minute nap.
13. Chug water.
14. Schedule a massage.
15. Follow an online yoga class.
16. Play with your dog (or your friend’s dog).
17. Don’t go into work — and don’t feel guilty about it.
18. Dance in your living room.
19. Wear something fancy.
20. Netflix.
21. Download a new podcast.
22. Reach out to an old friend.
23. Write a thank you note.
24. Plan a “staycation.”