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Tag: intention

Ask or invite

We are taught early on that when you need something, you ask. Ask for permission, ask for directions, ask for funding, ask for time off. Information is required, and in order to get an answer you must ask a question.
Invitations, however, are reserved for special occasions. To invite is to include and to welcome; an opportunity to further a relationship and encourage dialogue.
Inviting a company to join your cause or partner together builds a different dynamic than a pointed ask for resources and support. Instead of asking clients to buy your product, invite them to take part in a greater story (see Seth’s Permission Marketing and Bernadette’s Story of Telling).
The next time you need something, look for ways to create an invitation instead of a simple ask.

52 ways to connect

  1. Make a phone call.
  2. Send flowers.
  3. Write a note.
  4. Return an email.
  5. Volunteer with a local organization.
  6. Donate books.
  7. Host a garage sale.
  8. Share a hug.
  9. Cook dinner for friends.
  10. Surprise an older relative.
  11. Join a club.
  12. Listen to a motivational podcast.
  13. Take a walk in nature.
  14. Smile to a stranger.
  15. Use first names in meetings.
  16. Start a book club.
  17. Enroll in a class.
  18. Visit a local market.
  19. Praise good service.
  20. Meet a friend for coffee.
  21. Ask questions.
  22. Say hello.
  23. Walk a dog.
  24. Follow a YouTube yoga video.
  25. Skype a long-distance friend or family member.
  26. Create a music playlist.
  27. Attend an event by yourself.
  28. Make eye contact.
  29. Say thank you.
  30. Write a recommendation.
  31. Visit an art gallery.
  32. Reply to an ignored or forgotten message.
  33. Go to a sporting event.
  34. Pretend you’re a tourist in your home city.
  35. Run a race.
  36. Support your local museum.
  37. Use public transportation.
  38. Plan a picnic with friends.
  39. Start a blog.
  40. Take photographs.
  41. Participate in an online course.
  42. Message someone whose work you admire.
  43. Research community efforts in your area: CSAs, food swaps, community gardens, library projects.
  44. Visit a National Park.
  45. Plan a date night.
  46. Go on a morning walk with a friend.
  47. Surprise someone with a gift.
  48. Make a thoughtful introduction.
  49. Bake something for your neighbor.
  50. Pack lunch for a colleague.
  51. Compliment genuinely.
  52. Write a list of 20 things you are thankful for.

What if nobody shows up?

What if nobody comes? If your product isn’t well received? If you get one bad review after the next?

What if you thrill five people? And those five people are so impressed by your work that they tell their friends. Then five more people try your services or show up to your event or read your book. And out of those five, two people are so deeply moved that they share with their friends.

That’s how movements begin.

This is very different from the fast-track to fame we so often read about. It is difficult to catapult to the top of the “best list,” to become the richest and most sought after in one swoop. But slowly, with time, your work can amass a following.

The question is whether you have the patience to see it through. Can you delight in pleasing five people instead of 50? 1,000?

Your work is your art. Five people could mean success.

One week of consistency (a challenge)

What are the habits that define you? What are the actions that you take every day, no matter what? What are your “non-negotiables,” aspects of your day that you refuse to compromise, day in and day out?

Now…what do you want to change?

In one week, I challenge you to bring more awareness to your daily routine and incorporate a new element that supports your health and wellbeing. (What exactly that “new element” is, I’ll leave up to you.)

Day 1. Record your day. Observe your habits, places you unknowingly spend time. Certain rituals may occupy your days. Don’t judge, simply note your routine in a journal.

Day 2. Add something new. Drink hot water with lemon and honey first thing in the morning. Commit to a twenty-minute online yoga video. Go for a walk when you return home in the evening. Notice how this addition makes you feel.

Day 3. Repeat the same deliberate action you performed yesterday and aim to repeat it for the next four days.

Day 4. Reward yourself for your new commitment and treat yourself to something “out of the ordinary,” something that feels good. Dawdle over your morning coffee. Settle into a cozy café with a newspaper. Stop for a scoop of ice cream after work.

Day 5. Encourage someone else. Now that you are slowly filling your own cup, it is easier to support others. Say a positive word or publicly recognize a colleague’s work ethic. Notice how it feels to give.

Day 6. You may be tempted to “skip” whatever habit you committed to. Don’t. Write down any resistance you might have, note any obstacles that seem to get in the way of your own self-care: negative thinking, hectic scheduling, boredom, apathy. Keep going.

Day 7. Small actions create a ripple effect. Consistency builds over time and slowly, more discipline, more thoughtfulness, and more ease will come into your life. Decide what you want to invite in. Continue your “new element,” or try something else for the next seven days.

The path in front of you

It’s difficult to know what path to choose in terms of love, life, and work. Many of us are fortunate to be faced with choices (many choices): who to marry, where to live, what to do for an income.

Yet so many choices can be both paralyzing and confusing. Even depressing.

What if, instead of agonizing over the decision at hand, you found peace? That instead of drowning unease with more work or food or alcohol or worse, you settle into the life you’re living? What if, instead of looking into the future, you set aside time to be thankful and recognize where life has brought you?

Revel in that moment, that moment when several paths are before you. Cherish that day. That relationship. That job. Feel your feet on the ground, your seat in the chair, and place a hand over your heart. The path you’re seeking is the one you are on.

When you can’t make a decision

What if something better comes along? What if this is the wrong choice? What if I am not ready? Decision paralysis.
When you’re struggling to make a decision, imagine yourself choosing a definitive answer. Observe how you feel. Do your insides drop with dread, or does your heart skip with anticipation?
Often times we spend so much time analyzing and researching that we forget to consult the most important measure: Does it feel good? Will my decision bring me happiness? Does this choice feel exciting or laborious?
If you’re looking forward to whatever it is you might choose, you’re on the right track. If you’re not, say no.
Chase your excitement and choose happiness.