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Tag: courage

3 steps to writing anything important

Marketing collateral, an investor pitch, your Best Man’s speech, donor thank you notes, a love letter… writing is everywhere and often holds weight of daunting implications. The mere act of putting pen to page can result in temporary paralysis. To alleviate some of this stress, I’ve outlined basic steps to push your writing forward.

Think about WHO will be reading (or hearing) it.

You want your writing to be applicable. This is hard to do if you aren’t thinking about who’s on the receiving end.

Think about WHAT you’re trying to say.

What you want to say may look different than what actually ends up on the page. By making your intentions clear, you’ll throw an anchor into the oceanic waters of words and ground your writing as you begin.

WHY are you writing in the first place?

Why should I believe what you’re saying? Why do you care? Why should I? Give me facts and show me proof why you are who you say you are, why I should listen, why your message matters.

If you remember nothing else, take this with you:

who

what

why

I stopped trying.

I’m still trying to wrap my head around this, as it is completely counterintuitive to me.

The moment I stopped trying and quit everything is when things became clear.

I’m not saying I don’t have challenges and that life is always easy, but my day-to-day isn’t filled with as much strife. There’s less struggle as I move about the world.

I think of how difficult momentum seemed in the past. Once I landed back into the grooves of authenticity, people began to take notice. It’s then that I raised money for a few scholarships, attracted over 30k views on Medium, and found myself speaking on HuffPost (look at 13:30).

I’m not doing anything drastically different. I’m simply living my life by letting passion lead the way.

I’m wondering if this principle has worked for you, too.

What if WORKING HARD didn’t equal SUCCESS? What if you stepped out of the car, allowed your excitement to take the wheel, and put frustration, anxiety, and white-knuckle-decision-making in the backseat? What if by relaxing, you allowed your “best self” to emerge?

If you’re having to work really hard to make something right, I’m wondering if it’s right in the first place.

Tweet me. I want to hear what you think.

United by insecurity

No matter where your office is located, the ceiling can fall down. You don’t know when, but one day it will. There is even a possibility a car drives through your living room tonight while you’re sleeping.
We’ve done a great job fooling ourselves into believing we have it all figured out. We’ve worked hard to create predictable outcomes, studying to become masters of our environment. Data is plugged into spreadsheets, and dollars are spent on analyzing trends. Months are mapped out in advance. Calendars are scheduled to the minute. The year becomes a series of data points and action plans.
A soft mirage of familiarity has blanketed our world, producing a certain emotional numbness. We pick and choose what we want to feel. We pad ourselves from life with cars, TV shows, deadlines, large houses filled with things. The moment loneliness or vulnerability hits, we reach for our cell phones.
The irony is in all of this control and safety-making, we crave surprise and excitement. The tales of unpredictability are the ones we tell our friends. We sign up for marathons and Tough Mudders to feel something, to show the scrapes on our knees bearing witness of our participation. “Look at me, I’m living life!”
The moment you witness these tendencies is the moment you come alive. When you no longer cling to guarantees and you live in the challenge of each moment with nothing to hide.
This isn’t recklessness, it’s awareness. Some call it “mindful living,” the ability to observe what is happening as it happens. It’s not a need to know all of the answers but rather being in tune with the textures of your experience. It’s seeing the present for what it is, not what you wish for or as a result of what happened yesterday.
I often hear this question: “What’s next?”
I believe my flexibility in providing this answer has made my life what it is.
How wonderful it is to not know the answer.

Stop trying to find your purpose

We spend so much time searching.

The One, The Job, The House, The Car, The Experience, The Feeling, The Plan, The Salary, The Product, The Idea, The Connector, The Client, The Bargain, The Title, The Brand…

We’re looking for answers, assuming that once we find That Thing, the result we want will magically appear (happiness, success, love, fortune, fame, ease, contentment).

What if you stopped looking. Stay with me for a moment.

In Western Society, we’re taught that “A” action yields “B” outcome. So if I input X, Y, Z,  ___ should follow, right? (You fill in the blank.)

What if you channeled all of that energy you’re investing into finding That Thing towards your passion, instead? What if your excitement became the compass for your decision-making?

Chances are “your purpose” will appear when you’re not looking; not necessarily when you least expect it — because you’ll already be following your heart’s desires and will be so invested in your life and your work and giving to others that you’ll forget you were looking in the first place. Same goes for love.

Think of it less as a a fixed feeling or pre-defined experience and more as a rolling, morphing adventure.

#$*!% = QUIT

Quitting has become a dirty word, associated with failure and weakness.

Anyone who has experienced any measure of success knows that quitting is par for the course. A few dinners have opened with folks talking about their failures. Really talented, accomplished individuals getting honest about places they screwed up, projects that were complete disasters, even relationships that weren’t right.

I’m not sure quitting and failing is something that needs to be hidden. Your story could be the inspiration someone else needs.

If you want to read more on quitting (what to quit, how to quit, resources to help) check out The courage to quit on Medium.

What if the goal was to fail?

What if your goal was to experience rejection, to quit?

What if you set out trying to find twenty new ways of getting shot down, of hearing “No, thanks” at least fifteen times in one day?

What if your aim wasn’t to wildly succeed or sell the most product or to get everyone to like you?

What if you turned the graph upside down and thought of creative ways to beat everyone to the bottom?

What if you truly said fuck it and stopped watching numbers and started listening to your heart, your excitement, your passion instead?