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Those who can and those who cannot

There is no way to tell who will win.

A participant list doesn’t mean everyone will start the race. Some will wake up feeling under the weather and decide to stay in bed. A few joggers may step up to the line the “day-of,” making the decision to run that morning or even that hour.

Bang, the race is off: A few runners bolt out of the starting gate and lose steam before they are at the halfway mark. Others spent months practicing and pace themselves to conserve energy; they blaze the full course. A cramp or a sprained muscle may cause an athlete or two to drop unexpectedly. A surprising body clocks in, coming in fifteenth in her age category.

We can’t possibly know who is going to cross the finish line. The only certainty is who begins.

Place a sure bet on yourself by taking necessary steps to start.

3 things I learned starting a social enterprise in Nepal

Yesterday I had the honor of addressing attendees of Skövde Business Week. I presented my experiences founding the Learning House, a center devoted to education, leadership and community in Western Nepal. To hear my full talk, click this link.
I believe “A rising tide lifts all boats.” I don’t think scientific research is needed to show that more educated and competent citizens lead to more talented business recruits who in turn create better, more effective businesses. Getting the tide to rise is the difficult part.
My work has taught me the following:

  1. Travel through life curious.
  2. Extend yourself to another.
  3. Ask questions.

When we become fixed on an end result, we tend to lose beautiful opportunities along the way. Had I not allowed myself to explore Nepal, to be open to promise and potential and brokenness, I would have missed some truly profound moments. Since arriving in 2013, I have seen many volunteers come and go; some are so focused on their defined role as Volunteer Teacher they fail to look beyond designated responsibilities and connect with the people they came to serve in the first place.
We dig trenches around ourselves. They’re deepened by societal roles and professional delegations. Our personal selves and true passions become hidden from colleagues, friends, even our families. The irony is that when we move beyond these lines and reach out to each other, we forge meaningful relationships and experience life more deeply. This is when we win.
Finally, ask questions. Your colleague, your neighbor, your grandmother, your client. Who are they? Where are they going? Can you help? It’s impossible to solve problems and brainstorm solutions without taking time to listen. The most successful companies (and people!) are the ones listening — and they’re shifting, giving, adapting and changing in ways that show they care.

You have something precious

Several months ago I had the pleasure of speaking on the ChapterBe podcast. I talked about how I ended up in Nepal and lessons I’ve learned along the way. It was a great interview, punctuated with street dogs barking in the background.

The podcast highlights stories of people living across the globe who have made a commitment to live authentically, passionately, and with conviction. I was honored to be included.

We all have unique skills and stories that lead us down winding, magical roads. From the moment we wake up until our heads again find rest, our bodies are catapulted across spectacular terrain. Mothers feed families and dream of their children’s futures, fathers are forced to make decisions based upon their own life challenges, sons dare to become better than their parents, and daughters fight to turn dreams into reality.

My point is this: the lessons you’ve learned and the challenges you’ve overcome could help someone else facing a similar predicament. Have the courage to share.

Ignore them

There’s always a comment. No matter how great your effort is, how flawless your work, someone can do it better.
They’re whispering, “Your competitor is further along. Another company has edged you out this quarter. Her work is getting more publicity, more recognition.”
You’re spending time reading comments. “His project is scoring more funding. They’re getting all the sales.”
It doesn’t matter.
Keep on and stay the course. (It’s your course and your course alone. Not theirs.)
Do your best work, no matter what they say.

7 steps to find your purpose

“How do I find my purpose?” I hear this one a lot. It’s a big question, and in Western society, a lot of weight is placed on the answer. When I came across mine, I wasn’t looking. In fact, I had given up the pro/con lists and analysis charts, and I donated “What Color Is Your Parachute?” to the local bookstore. I very well understood what I did and did not like. I knew exactly what caused me pain and what made me feel good. I knew that giving to others and serving communities made me feel at ease and alive and redirected self-absorption away from myself and onto something positive.

While the path to finding purpose is hardly straight and narrow, there are steps you can take to find your way.

1. Know what you’re good at.
This requires a bit of truth-telling on your part. If you have dreams of joining the MLS but lack coordination and athleticism, it might not be the best use of your energy to focus on what’s unattainable. Instead, consider the skills and talents you do have. What do you do well? What are you known for? Ask a friend if you need help identifying your plus points.

2. Know what you hate.
Sometimes knowing what you DO NOT LIKE is easier than figuring out what you do. It’s pretty straight-forward if you have a visceral reaction to something, and you know when you dislike a certain kind of work. It’s simple: don’t like it, don’t do it.

3. Identify your “non-negotiables.”
This is a phrase often used by matchmaking extraordinaire Patti Stanger. Not only can identifying a list of “must-haves” in a mate help you find The One, it can also help you find The Work. The process forces you to drill down those items that are most important to you while simultaneously reminding you of the fact there will always be shortcomings. No situation is perfect. Compromise and exchange is inherent to the most valuable relationships and life experiences. You will have to give up something in order to do the kind of work you love. What that something is depends on you.

4. Change your environment.
From the clients I’ve worked with, the ones most looking for their purpose are the ones feeling the most stuck. Altering your environment can help. It doesn’t need to be a trip around the world. Changing the furniture in your office, hanging new paintings, even going for long walks can freshen your perspective.

5. Establish routine.
This sounds counterintuitive, but creating a daily routine builds the framework to invite sparks of imagination into your world. It’s like a creative brief: without one, creative people go crazy. Provide a bit of guidance, however, and ideas can be channeled in such a way that finished projects satisfy and delight clients. You also need structure to feel good. Eat frequent meals, sleep at consistent times, exercise regularly. Having a schedule will give your mind a break in routine areas so it can focus on what really matters.

6. Realize nothing is perfect.
Even when you do find the work that makes you come alive, there will be days that feel like death. Once you realize this, there is less pressure on daily ups and downs, and you can relax into projects that bring you satisfaction. I’m not talking about settling, I’m talking about coming to terms with moments that are challenging and hard (typically these tumultuous times are good for you, serving to recommit yourself to your purpose).

7. Don’t stop.
Don’t quit. Don’t give up. You’re too important. The world needs you.

Excuses (If…then)

When I have enough money, then I’ll volunteer my time.
When the kids are out of the house, then I’ll travel.
When I become famous, then I’ll write a book.
When I’m less busy, then I’ll start going to the gym.
Focus too much on when, and then may never happen. Focus on then, and when becomes less important. Our dreams are far too valuable to take a backseat to circumstance.