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Category: Challenge

Those who can and those who cannot

There is no way to tell who will win.

A participant list doesn’t mean everyone will start the race. Some will wake up feeling under the weather and decide to stay in bed. A few joggers may step up to the line the “day-of,” making the decision to run that morning or even that hour.

Bang, the race is off: A few runners bolt out of the starting gate and lose steam before they are at the halfway mark. Others spent months practicing and pace themselves to conserve energy; they blaze the full course. A cramp or a sprained muscle may cause an athlete or two to drop unexpectedly. A surprising body clocks in, coming in fifteenth in her age category.

We can’t possibly know who is going to cross the finish line. The only certainty is who begins.

Place a sure bet on yourself by taking necessary steps to start.

Stop trying to find your passion; do something nice for someone instead.

There’s a lot of pressure out there to “do meaningful work,” “find your bliss” and “unleash your passion.” We’re lucky to live in a time and place where we have the opportunity to make choices; choices about where we work, who we work for, what we do to make money, who we date, where we buy groceries, what we learn, which book to read.
The decisions we face on a daily basis are countless; oftentimes, overwhelming. Undergraduates stress over which major to declare; the seasoned professional has multiple job offers on the table and doesn’t know which one to pick. Like the grocery store aisle with boxes upon boxes of cereal, it’s easy to go with the tried-tested-and-true or to simply, walk away. This paradox of choice can leave us stale, uninspired, imprisoned.
Today, throw it out the window: the pro/con lists, the should’s and must’s, the cost-benefit analysis and the What Will They Think Of Me insecurities. Just for today, put yourself on the sidelines and place someone else before you. It doesn’t have to be a huge, grandiose gesture. Be kind.
Volunteer. Read to a child. Surprise someone with flowers. Pack a lunch for a co-worker.
For more ideas, including buying coffee for the next person in line or supporting an entrepreneur in a developing country, click here.

The path to purpose may not be straight

Employees, employers, job seekers alike have recognized there is no direct route to The Role, The Position, The Job, The Title, The Mission. What was once seen as a liner progression has evolved into a winding, twisting path in which many skills are acquired along the way. Because of this, overlaps have found themselves folded between industries, and relationships blossom in places once before unrealized.

This is what makes Project Exponential successful: areas of commonality and unexpected crossover. The finance manager and singer-songwriter connect over adventure. The marketer and social worker trouble-shoot failing education systems. The artist and the therapist talk honestly about mistakes they’ve made and the value they found through them.

For over three years, dinners have resulted in friendships, mentorships, new ideas, inspiration, even romance. Why? Our dinner guests are open, eager, curious, generous, and they want to learn.

I could have never imagined my varied experiences would lead me to my life’s work — from social work to probation to university admissions; counselor, artist, marketer and writer; fundraiser, social worker and entrepreneur — but they did. My work has been punctuated by mentors, students, clients and teachers; relationships and friendships have blended with passion and pure guts to steer my course.

Please, please remain open to experiences and opportunity, but most importantly, be open to the people who cross your way.

Trying less, not more

“Try is best” somehow evolved into “try harder.” If we don’t get the results we’ve set out for, it is a direct reflection of the work we’ve put forth. No success? You must’ve done something wrong. You didn’t reach the bar, you don’t measure up, you didn’t work HARD enough.

The irony is life seems to expand when you relax the muscles you’ve been stressing for so long. No only can constriction lead to strain and injury, it prohibits freedom and creativity and even limits the breath. There are moments and situations it’s not about your effort at all; it’s more about relaxing and letting go.

Like the “cool kid,” something about him is magnetic, we can’t help but stay away (Because we all think he isn’t trying; in reality, however, he’s trying very, very hard.).

So where is that middle balance between working like a dog and easing into it? What if the growth comes from easing off the gas, driving a little more relaxed and enjoying the road? It seems THAT is when success comes. And people can’t help but stay away.

I will tell you how to get what you want

If I told you there there was one thing you could do every day to get you exactly what you want, would you do it? (The body, the girl, the salary, the job, the car, the book deal, the promotion, the ring, whatever.)
I’ll tell you exactly what you need to hear; concrete steps that inch you towards your dream, but before I do, you must commit to doing one act daily. (This tells me if you really, REALLY actually want it. Or if you’re just pretending.) You must promise: one action, every day.
Would you do it?
Because somehow we’ve stepped onto the all-or-nothing bandwagon. Yes, we’ll get on board, but only if we can run a fast sprint to where we want to go. “Daily” means commitment and time, both of which sound daunting. “Can you guarantee the outcome?” you say. “OK, maybe I’ll try. But ONLY if I’m promised That Thing.” Because it’s too much work, too much effort. And the dream! It’s so far away, we can’t even see it from here. So why bother?
Now I want to ask: What if your dream isn’t really it?
What if, at the end of 90 days, you change. If, 124 days later, your perspective shifts and you realize you actually want something else. What if, at the end of 315 days, you find yourself happier? On the 402nd day, you discover a completely new you, a you with more happiness and grace and wealth and peace than you ever before imagined.
Our lives expand when we move past all or nothing. All or nothing typically results in self-sabotage; we give up, we give in, we feel guilt and disappointment and shame if we can’t go from 0 to 10. We want what we want, and we want it NOW. If we can’t get it now, very few people will invest the time and energy to get it later.
But what if small steps made us feel better? If a 10 minute daily walk brought us more peace and comfort in our bodies than bi-weekly torture sessions in the gym? If small pieces of chocolate were included into our days instead of weekly binge “cheat” days? If our dream of writing a book happened slowly, over time, instead of “When I quit my job…when I take a vacation…when I get a raise…when the kids leave the house?”
What if your dream could start today? Maybe not the grandiose final version, not the iPhone 7, but the first generation; something real and tangible and in our hands. Today.
Would you take some rather than none? Or do you want to hold onto an empty dream?