Creating with intention
There are moments you’re sick or tired or bored.
You’re not sure whether to stick or quit. It’s unclear whether progress is being made. Patterns seem hardwired, destined to repeat. Nothing makes sense, and the future is uncertain.
You’re questioning your work, your decisions, the motives of people around you. You’re questioning yourself.
These are the defining moments. This is when you find your passion and what really matters.
Last night I had a dream I got a tattoo. It was a big black tribal symbol winding down the side of my face and neck. Sometimes my hair would hide it, but no amount of accessories or clothing could conceal its dark lines. I spent most of the dream trying to come to terms with it and accept the fact I had this thing permanently etched onto my skin.
I’ve sat with NY Times bestselling authors, farmers in Nepal, Tibetan Buddhists, Wall Street sharks, Italian philosophers and millionaires from California. They all have one thing in common:
Everyone wants something.
I have yet to meet an individual who is 100% honestly, truly satisfied. Everyone has some benchmark they are trying to tip, some element of their life they wish they could change. This is life.
No matter where you are, who you are, how much money you have, or who sleeps next to you, there is something that could be better, easier, more exciting, different. This gap drives who we are and what we do. We spend so much time and energy building, creating, altering and striving that it seems against our nature to be satisfied.
Acceptance is one of those gold terms; if you nail it, you’re rich. Wealth comes from recognizing what cannot be changed and where there is opportunity (of self, of others, the good and bad of what life deals you). If you can work with what you have, you’re well on your way.
It’s easy to focus on big issues. They’re the blaring, obvious ones, and they make for easy complaints. Small actions can be more difficult to identify and require more brain power and attention.
More industries are understanding the value of these details and the importance they have in long term change. We’re seeing this trend with the rising popularity of “micro-” vernacular: micro-lending, micro-movements, micro-grants, micro-lancing.
Over time, small actions add up. Whether it’s a business owner planning out his annual forecast or the dieter writing a daily meal plan, daily decisions have great consequence.
The challenge is this: starting now.
(Tip: the first few actions you take in your day set the tone for what’s to come.)
If you hate your job, you cannot afford to stay one more day.
Over half of college graduates accept jobs that aren’t in their preferred industries (Bureau of Labor Statistics). People are bored, tired, and return home cranky and angry. Distraction comes in the form of stimuli — alcohol, drugs, buying things, selling things, gambling, eating, checking out in front of a screen.
You’ve invested too much in yourself — your education and training — to remain in a stifling workplace, performing tasks that are redundant. You are too valuable. Each second of your life is a precious moment you can’t get back. A bus could take you out tomorrow.
As difficult as it might seem to find a new gig, your life depends on it.
Your checkbook isn’t the only thing you should worry about. The bigger balance is your soul.
Looking for a job?
You’ve made your first mistake. As cliché as it sounds, you won’t find it if you’re looking for it. Instead, make moves to create the position of your dreams (a place you feel valued and valuable, projects you’re interested in, opportunities that benefit from your talents, people you admire).
1. Skip small talk and have real conversations.
Schedule twenty-minute informational calls (or coffees) with people you respect to learn more about their work. Ask about the good, bad, and ugly bits of their industry. Then, find parallel roles in different fields and ask those individuals how they tackle similar challenges. Meaningful conversations build meaningful relationships.
And say thank you. You never know when your paths may cross. I’ve met strangers in Shanghai I’ve introduced to entrepreneurs in California. Your rolodex is one of your most prized commodities.
2. Know thyself.
What’s your anchor? You need something grounding you, a general direction you’re heading. It doesn’t need to be entirely specific, but you need a fencepost to harness your efforts (think of a laser beam vs. diffused light; concentrated anything is stronger and more effective).
Find a quiet place to relax with a cup of coffee and honestly assess what makes you miserable, what you’re good at, what you’d like to be doing, and what you can’t live without. Reserve an afternoon — or a week — to pay close attention to moments your heart flutters. Is it anxiety, excitement, or both?
3. Are you hunting or fishing?
You can look for freelance work or you can start writing articles about topics you’re passionate about. You can ask for job openings or you can volunteer a few hours of pro-bono consulting and evaluate a company’s needs. You can ask for references or you can send role models invitations to lectures that pertain to their projects.
By placing yourself in environments that highlight your strengths, you will attract opportunities and connections that are right for you. Just because you don’t have a job doesn’t mean you can’t start cultivating something great.
4. Walk with confidence.
Unemployment doesn’t mean you’re less of a person. When you’re feeling down and out, it shows. Pay attention to your posture and the way you walk. If you’ve completed Steps 1-3, do so confidently, with your head high.
You have skills, you have talents; flaunt them. Your childhood, your struggles, your unique lessons and experiences all contribute to what makes you uniquely valuable. Make a list of your areas of expertise and fold it into your wallet if you’re needing an extra boost.
5. Open windows and doors and screens and welcome everyone over for tea.
If you can reframe “unemployment” as an opportunity, you’re on your way to gold. Imagine yourself as a traveler, an adventurer. There will be ups and downs, exhilaration and disappointment. Open up to all of it. It’s too easy to focus on one thing and dwell; you’ll think yourself into a frenzy, or worse yet, paralyze yourself from action. Force your anxieties to adopt a wider perspective and welcome whatever comes your way, regardless of form. If you allow it, your journey may surprise you.
Why wait to do what you love?
Do what you love.