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Travel and volunteering

Travel isn’t just about a place, it’s about the people you meet along the way, and volunteering can be a wonderful way to connect. Not only will you learn more about the community, their culture, their struggles and their celebrations, you can help in a meaningful way — perhaps even leave a lasting impact.

But as a traveler, you have responsibility. You have responsibility for the choices you make, the businesses you support, the money you bring into a country and spend. For this reason, “voluntourism” programs are on the rise, hoping to capitalize on the hearts and checkbooks of do-gooders.

How do you find the right organization to volunteer with? Don’t be afraid of asking questions: what you’ll be doing, how you’ll be providing support, where your fees go. Be realistic about your skills and abilities and be open to the many different experiences that come along with entering a new culture. You may find yourself in potentially uncomfortable situations. Yes, pack your essentials and bring a few comforts to remind you of home, but don’t make comfort your first priority.

In travel and in business, put people first and be willing to step beyond the familiar.

7 perks of growing up

I sat down to make my annual birthday list of what I’m grateful for. I’ve noticed some common themes, and I’m attributing positive change in my life to these seven key areas:

Patience – In my twenties, I was carried away by emotions and split-second decisions like a kite in the wind. With time, I’ve learned how to sit through unpleasant and uncomfortable feelings and deal with situations from a more focused, grounded place.

Perspective – A friend once told me perspective was the key to a happy life. I agree, for I have found that keeping a balanced scale when confronting challenges and successes makes a big difference. There will be lows and there will be highs, good days and bad, some uninspired days in between. (As a monk once told me, “If there is no night, how can there be day?”) Also: never underestimate the power of a good laugh.

Confidence – Gone are the days when a negative word sends me into a downward spiral. I’ve learned the importance of being yourself and how not giving a fuck can propel your career and personal development forward.

Curiosity – Curiosity is like a plant. Feed it, nurture it, it will grow. This is one of the most exciting parts of living: the ability to explore, ask questions, learn and be stumped.

Compassion – Life experiences have given me a better understanding of the pain and challenges swirling around in the world, and time has taught me the wisdom and patience needed to listen to others without making assumptions. Of course you may not have been through exactly the same situation as someone else, but you can listen to their unique story with an open heart and mind.

Relationships – I’ve gently discarded relationships that are harmful and have embraced those that are loving, supportive and encouraging. I no longer hold onto people out of guilt or necessity. Instead, I actively choose those individuals who stand by me through ups and the downs. I appreciate these people dearly.

Contentment – I am able to enjoy and savor simple moments without constantly having to worry about the next move or what might happen in the future.

What do you think is best about growing old(er)? Tweet me @redheadlefthand.

Here’s to another great year of discovery and excitement!

Let’s go to an art residency for one hour, every day

Writing residencies spoil people.

I just finished one month completely devoted to artistic creation. The schedule was up to me, when I wanted to work, for how long and on what. I was surrounded by other energetic artists who were on their own programs — some stayed up all night holed up in their studios, others spent afternoons baking cakes and cookies in the communal kitchen. I could go for long walks in the morning or take a yoga class at night. Aside from a weekly group check-in, the agenda was totally up to me.

The setting was magical (Woodstock, NY) and buildings historic (founded in 1902), but the greatest gift was time. I was taken from my day-to-day responsibilities and placed in an entirely new environment. My sole aim: To focus on the creative pursuit of my choosing.

It was luxurious.

And I realize, not entirely practical.

Two days before the residency ended, I panicked. How am I going to finish what I started? I am going back into the “real world” where tasks and duties and meetings and schedules and a full email inbox await. I understand residencies are temporal and intermittent and not everyone can take a month out of their life to do art.

A fellow writer at the residency had a invaluable answer I want to share with you.

One hour.

One hour a day, she said, whenever it suits you. In the morning, in the evening, in the late afternoon. Set a timer and write. No more, no less. One hour. When that alarm goes off, you turn off, put the pen down, close the computer and walk away.

I can do that, I think. And so can you.

For this next month, let’s commit one hour every day to focus on our goals. To create. To write. To do the work, whatever that means to you.

Note: I’m not saying a finished piece in thirty days. We’re only holding each other accountable for clocking in time. Sixty daily uninterrupted minutes. We’re creating our own artist residency together, and it doesn’t require travel or communal living or time off from work/school/family.

Let’s do this. Tweet me, message me, let me know what you’re working on.

10 lessons learned from 3 years of blogging

This week marks the 3rd anniversary of Project Exponential; 3 years of meals served, friends made, and surprising connections between industries and ideas. I am filled with gratitude and awe when I think about those I have been fortunate to introduce.

The anniversary also marks three years of blogging. When I first started, it was a completely new venture. I wan’t sure how to go about it or what to say, and I didn’t know if anyone would care.

I’ve learned so much since those initial posts and want to share a glimpse of what I’ve gained along the way:

1. Establish a practice.

When I started blogging, I would churn out posts several times a week. Eventually I realized that with client work, hosting dinners and volunteering in Nepal, I was struggling to keep up. I settled on once a week and have held myself accountable ever since. My schedule has become routine. I find myself noting possible topics and thoughts that could turn into a post throughout the week.

My tip: Forget about what other bloggers are doing. Find what works for you and stick to it.

2. Small bricks build something substantial.

A handful of blog posts didn’t mean much at first. Three years later, I have accumulated a body of work I am proud of. I regularly receive emails from people who “stumble upon my blog” and find something useful. Put in time and commitment, and you’ll see results.

3. Blogging forces you to discover and connect.

Because of the blog, I have met new people, come across new ideas and found new sources of inspiration — both online and off. Searching for articles and specific topics has introduced me to inspiring bloggers and new theories. As a result, I’ve re-considered some of my viewpoints, developed new ways of thinking, added more sites to my Bookmarks bar, and have exchanged emails with talented writers.

4. Done is better than perfect.

This might be one of the most difficult lessons to learn, but it’s absolutely necessary. Waiting for perfection only hurts yourself. You can spend hours upon hours obsessing over nuances and phrases. Don’t give the Schedule/Publish button unnecessary power. Perfect is a crazy, evading word and we are our own worst critics. Do your best work, be prudent in your edits, then click Submit.

5. You don’t have to be technically inclined to blog.

Sure, I kept a blog when I was traveling around the world in my late teens. But when I considered blogging for professional purposes, I figured only famous people did it. I also thought I needed more technical knowledge. Turns out you don’t have to be computer savvy to write a blog people enjoy. With a choice of platforms and writing tools, anyone can get online and put their thoughts in the world.

6. Don’t stop experimenting.

The first few blog posts feel like a great big experiment. Everything is uncertain and new, and you don’t really have any idea how it works. That feeling eventually fades, but it doesn’t mean you should stop experimenting. Try new writing styles, vary posts from lists to personal accounts to asking questions to honest challenges. Challenge yourself to feel uncomfortable after you start feeling comfortable.

7. Blogging is good for business.

Aside from standard SEO results, the more you write, the more authority you have. Blogging helps cement what you know and show others you can back up your claims. Writing regularly on particular topics helps the right people find you and helps you provide clear information to potential customers. Links and trackbacks to other blogs can build relationships with experts in your industry, and regular posts prove that you’re relevant and up-to-date.

8. Caring what other people think only paralyzes you.

This speaks for itself. Obviously there are societal norms you should keep in mind, but too much questioning and assuming and worrying and forecasting will only ruin your writing and destroy your creative process.

9. I still write with a pen.

My best writing happens when I write in a notebook then transfer to a computer later on. I type directly when I’m short on time or traveling, but I recognize it’s just not as good. Knowing what works for you and acknowledging your strengths and weaknesses is instrumental to your development as a writer.

10. Read good writing.

I have a list of writers I respect and admire. Their websites are saved on my computer, and I drop in and see what they’re up to from time to time. I always leave their websites feeling inspired. Admiring the way they spin words and describe their experiences encourages me to keep working on my own craft.

Whoever those people are for you, study them. Figure out why you are drawn to their work and what is successful about their writing. The best teachers are perpetual students, and the best writers are perpetual readers. Strive to do both.

Search for meaning

The internet gives you many lives. You can write an article once, muster the courage to post it online, become disappointed when it falls flat and goes unshared, resolve to forget about it and write something else. Then one day, you wake up to an inbox of responses and questions as if this was a piece you posted yesterday.

This sometimes happens to me.

Lately, a few of my Medium posts have undergone rebirths, and I’ve found myself answering questions about the search for meaning and joy and life. “Should I go to a monastery?” “Do I need to volunteer in a different country to find myself?” “What advice can you give me to discover my passion?”

I don’t have any answers, really. I know that the answers we often want most are right in front of us. They don’t necessarily require a trip around the world, months spent in solitude, or someone else to show us the way. I wish I could tell you a perfect formula. I wish I had this formula myself three years ago when I first set out for Nepal.

But I think that’s my big secret. I stopped looking.

I was driving myself crazy with these exact same questions. I was browsing the self-help section for career changes, dog-eared my way through What Color Is Your Parachute, and still no answers. My journal was a messy scrawl of ink and tear, I mean, coffee stains when I got on that first plane to Kathmandu. I knew was I was hurting and raw and sick of feeling like crap. I wanted to feel good, both in the world and in my body and make a positive contribution somewhere. And this is how I found myself teaching English to a bunch of rowdy monks.

No, I had no idea I was going to start a Learning House. If you told me I’d spend the next three years of my life in Nepal, I would have laughed. But I did know that giving to others and empowering individuals through education brought me deep satisfaction. In this way, my focus shifted from myself and onto something positive. I stopped questioning and just did.

Meaning found me. I hope it finds you.

Those who can and those who cannot

There is no way to tell who will win.

A participant list doesn’t mean everyone will start the race. Some will wake up feeling under the weather and decide to stay in bed. A few joggers may step up to the line the “day-of,” making the decision to run that morning or even that hour.

Bang, the race is off: A few runners bolt out of the starting gate and lose steam before they are at the halfway mark. Others spent months practicing and pace themselves to conserve energy; they blaze the full course. A cramp or a sprained muscle may cause an athlete or two to drop unexpectedly. A surprising body clocks in, coming in fifteenth in her age category.

We can’t possibly know who is going to cross the finish line. The only certainty is who begins.

Place a sure bet on yourself by taking necessary steps to start.