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Tag: decisions

Keeping the flame alive

A student saw KEEP THE FLAME ALIVE on a movie poster and asked me, “What is flame and why does it need to be alive?” The movie was about a married couple inviting a stranger into their home to try to spice up their fizzling love life.

I described fire, from the moment you flick a match until the last wisps of smoke float away. “You know how happy you are when you get a new shirt?” I asked. He nodded enthusiastically. “But in time, the shirt gets old and you don’t like it as much?” More agreement. If you don’t take care of fire, it eventually burns out.

Not only fire. Energy, projects, teams, excitement, zest, flavor, curiosity. What’s new is exciting and mysterious. In time, mystique and interest become be replaced with comfort and familiarity. It’s up to you to decide which characteristics best serve you.

Relax, everything is going to be OK

If you knew everything would be OK, would you spend more time with your close friends? Take more time for yourself? Eat differently? Leave the office earlier?

If you knew the outcome would be OK, would you relax, ease up? Work harder?

How would your strategy change?

If everything was going to be OK, would you save more? Worry less? Sleep at night?

Of course there’s a chance it won’t be. If you’re doing work that’s risky and creative, you’re pushing edges. Emotions become linked with success and failure, and instability tests resolve.

Ease into it. You might surprise yourself by worrying less and making different choices. Change doesn’t happen overnight.

“It’s not my job.”

Taking responsibility inevitably sets you up, while watching from the sidelines gives you that head start should an anvil hit. There’s always the option to run.
When you step in to do a little more and claim ownership (no matter how small), the work becomes personal. This is where thoughtful decisions are made and jobs are performed with integrity.
“It’s not my job” is too big of a shortcut to take, especially if you’re hoping to get someplace else. Whether you’re looking for a raise, a promotion, a better position or a more flexible company, venture beyond the lines of your job description and look for ways to help your team succeed.
It might not be your job, but it’s definitely your reputation. How safe do you want to play?

One shot

When you only have one chance, it matters. Your heart races, your mind scans all the outcomes — what if I fail? what if I make a mistake? what if I lose? what if I win? — and you do your best not to blow it.
Faced with twenty shots, however, you start to relax. Your breathing levels out as there isn’t as much pressure to perform. You savor the experience knowing there’s another chance. If you do screw up, it doesn’t matter. You have another shot.
Seth Godin wisely points out that with the internet, we’ve been granted not only with twenty but an unlimited number of shots. Whether buying, selling, researching, writing, connecting or dating, we have choices and options unfurling miles in front of us. We don’t have to be so afraid anymore. Just step up and take another shot.

What entrepreneurs don’t really talk about

Last week: This sucks! What am I doing? Why am I here?

This week: This is awesome! We’re doing so good! Look, it’s working!

And so forth. Up and down, up and down, up and down.

I know I’m not the only entrepreneur with these rollercoaster moments.

The trick is managing these “low” moments just long enough while trusting that better moments are around the corner. A difficult, but extremely necessary skill.

Success isn’t always about numbers. And yes, sometimes there are moments that feel entirely dismal. What separates successful endeavors from failures is grit and determination. Hang in there. It will get better (and if it doesn’t, you can always quit).

The value of meeting new people (offline)

Hectic schedules and limited time pushes “meeting new people” down priority lists. But new people can add spark to your life. From work strategies to personal motivation, even brief encounters can leave a lifetime mark. A meaningful conversation can inspire you to try something new, do better work, become a more thoughtful person, or keep going down the right path.

Online we’re exposed to new tactics and images, but face-to-face encounters are more likely to contribute to trust and long-term relationships. These connections help businesses thrive. While it’s easy to forget a screen name, personal interactions build experiences that help tell stories. And in a world where storytelling and marketing drive results, representing your “personal brand” is key.

Meeting new people may also reveal unknown parts of yourself, creating self-awareness of your own expertise and highlighting areas that still need work. There are health benefits, too: improved cognitive function, physical health and creative power.

Our next dinner event is scheduled for May 31 in NYC. Send an email to info@projectexponential.com with details about your current projects if you’re interested in attending. Our dinners match those with complementary interests and skills, and space is limited to preserve intimacy and quality.