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Rules for Adventurous Living

“You’re so lucky! I want your life!”
If you’ve heard this, you probably know luck has very little to do with it.
If you haven’t, you, too, can live the life that gets people asking, “How do you do it?” by following these tips for living adventurously:

Don’t: Be afraid of looking like a fool.

The “foolish” moments are the stories you’ll share later on. You won’t always have the answers, and on some days, you’ll feel like you are grasping at straws. This is how you grow. When you expose your weaknesses and vulnerabilities, you’ll place yourself in situations and in relationships that will stretch your understanding of the world and test your mettle. And when you meet people who are living the life, don’t be afraid to ask them: “How are you doing it?”

Don’t: Shy away from mistakes.

Screwing up means you’re learning, and if you’re worried about making a mess, you’re going to lead a very boring existence. The grit and the dirt and the flailing around is what gives life texture. Mistakes can be our biggest teachers. If you’re not making any, you’re probably not stretching yourself. Adventure comes from trying, failing, getting back up, and trying again.

Do: Lean on the help of others.

I used to be unreasonably afraid of asking for help. Asking for something meant I was not capable of providing for myself or I miscalculated something in someway. Wrong. Deeper relationships can develop once you let go of your ego. By allowing someone else to help you, you’ll be given a glimpse into their world as you navigate your own. People want to help, but you must first give them permission to do so.

Do: Appreciate the little things.

Cherish wins, no matter how small. Take time to savor each moment. Step away from work, gadgets and screens and invest hours giving to others or spending time with your family. Sometimes you need an afternoon to do nothing — send a few greeting cards and go for a walk. The most exciting stories can emerge from everyday activities. Seeing routine with fresh eyes can make the world of difference.

Don’t: Always shoot from the hip.

While serendipity can be magical, strategic moves are necessary. Too much risk can cause unstable footing, and clear vision vision can help minimize losses while informing calculated choices. Identify your top priorities and work backwards to move closer to your personal finish line.

Do: Think…but don’t think too much.

Believe it or not, you can get in your own way. Over-thinking can be counterproductive and distract you from hidden gems. If you try to plan each and every move, you’ll rob yourself from the mystery and delight of unexpected surprise. Hand over the keys and let your heart lead the way. Once your intuition grabs the wheel, your destination might pleasantly surprise you.

Don’t: Be too busy for kindness. Ever.

This cannot be overstated. We are all in this together. Why not make the folks around you shine just a little brighter while you’re at it? Look for ways to infuse kindness into your day-to-day. Surprise a loved one with a note, pack lunch for a neighbor, host a dinner party for your closest friends.

Do: Say thank you.

What goes around comes around. A simple “thank you” can open more doors than you could possibly imagine. Thoughtful reflection reminds you where you’ve come from and where you’re going, and gratitude works both ways. You need to express it as much as the people around you need to hear it.

29 thoughts from a 29-year-old

  1. Decide to get it done. Commit. Go.
  2. Goals will keep you on track.
  3. Fears take on tricky disguises. Call them out or enlist the help of someone who can.
  4. Helping others is one of the best things you can do with your time.
  5. You will learn more traveling than sitting in a classroom.
  6. Relationships are containers for growth.
  7. Be kind.
  8. Laugh more.
  9. It’s OK to make mistakes.
  10. It’s OK to admit you’re wrong.
  11. It’s OK to say no.
  12. Sometimes you don’t know what you want. Do what you enjoy, instead.
  13. Metabolism can be cruel; eat healthy, get sleep, be good to yourself.
  14. Take more risks.
  15. If it excites you, do it.
  16. No one else will know your value until you do.
  17. You don’t need permission to act. Stop waiting to be told.
  18. Finished is better than half started.
  19. Give others permission to recognize your worth.
  20. Stop waiting for perfect. “Good enough” is just fine. Perfect doesn’t exist.
  21. Nothing is permanent.
  22. No decision is irreversible.
  23. It’s never “too late.”
  24. People can change.
  25. Love is what happens after the butterflies fade.
  26. Home is a place you create for yourself.
  27. Get outside daily.
  28. Dream big. Great, now dream bigger.
  29. Hold nothing back.

Do you know your value?

Your value is much more than a dollar amount. It’s your time, your emotional investment, your energy, your connections. It’s your life.

Your worth is not just about confidence. It’s your dreams, where you’re going, what you want. It’s knowing what you need to get there and asking for it, unapologetically and with conviction.

By recognizing your worth, you’re helping colleagues and partners understand your art and the work that you do. You’re giving permission for others to acknowledge your greatness, and you’re making it easier for them to do so. In fact, knowing your worth will make many things easier — decisions, saying no, welcoming that which brings you joy, defining roles within both personal relationships and work agreements.

The confidence you have in yourself is contagious. Understand you’re bettering others by bettering yourself.

Listen wisely.

There are times you’ll feel like giving up.
Something else will come along, tempt you, appeal to your vulnerability, try to lure you back to the world you wanted to leave in the first place.
And then…

  • long hours
  • sleepless nights
  • infrequent, unreliable pay
  • instability, uncertainty
  • temporary narrowed vision, neglect of self and others
  • an obsessive desire to work (all of the time!)
  • scrapping, hustling, clinging, clawing
  • frustration
  • failing
  • loneliness
  • despair

What is louder: momentary discomfort or the dreams you have for yourself?
You’ll hear lots of voices — of fear, of doubters, of jealous naysayers…
Of the true calling of your heart.
Listen wisely.

Read this when you actually want to get it done.

Writer’s block. It happens to the best of us. Procrastination, exhaustion, complaining, and straight up avoidance isn’t unique to you, either. When you’ve had enough wallowing and decide it’s time to actually get things done, here are 10 steps to lead you onto the path of production.

And yes, I followed my own advice to write this post (see image).

  1. Get off Facebook.photo
  2. Step away from the computer.
  3. Go for a bike ride.
  4. Take a shower.
  5. Sit somewhere new. Or change your desk around.
  6. Get reacquainted with pen, paper, markers, tape, glue…
  7. Turn off the phone! Really!
  8. Realize that everything will still be there in one hour. Emails can wait. Voicemails aren’t going anywhere. No one will die.
  9. Chunk it. Break it down into bite-sized pieces. Set mini goals if you must.
  10. Stop trying to be perfect. Write crap. Come up with terrible ideas. Just start.