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Tag: confidence

Sometimes the best decision is the wrong one.

We’re bombarded with decisions.

Each day we’re faced with a record number of choices. From seemingly insignificant deliberations:

  • what to eat
  • what to wear
  • calendar scheduling
  • whether to walk or bike
  • branded or generic
  • what gifts to buy

to potentially life altering dilemmas:

  • which job to accept
  • what school to attend
  • who to marry
  • stock investments
  • starting a business
  • having children

It’s no wonder folks shy away from concrete decisions. They’re afraid. The bitterness of failure can paralyze even the most steeled among us. We all want to find the best path and make choices leading to our happiness and success, but the pressure to do so becomes burdensome. As a result, we get in our own way, stunt our growth, and eliminate perfectly good opportunities.

Realize any decision can be a good one, and the fear of making a bad choice subsides.

Wrong decisions can provide valuable information about your next best move. If you are willing to observe and take note of your experience and emotional response, most “mistakes” offer beneficial teaching moments.

Give yourself permission to make wrong decisions.

Growth and advancement requires some measure of commitment, risk, and fearlessness. If you can remove labels and take pressure off each decision, you’ll be able to access more and gain from each experience. Refuse to compromise for an abridged version; focus your vision on long-term growth instead.

10 questions to the best version of yourself

  1. Are you surrounded by people who encourage you to step up your game?
  2. Does your work excite you?
  3. Do your daily priorities align with your grander visions and dreams?
  4. What do you gravitate towards during unscheduled time?
  5. Have you set subgoals that tee you up for greater success?
  6. Do you schedule time each day to recharge and create?
  7. Have you written your dream list?
  8. Do you actively step outside of your comfort zone and seek adventure?
  9. Do you scare yourself regularly?
  10. Are you proud of the story you tell? (Is it positive or discouraging?)

Two words

Dream big.

Bigger than you’ve ever imagined.
Greater than you thought possible.
More daring than they taught you.
Risky beyond your comfort.
Away from the path that’s known.
With two words, change your life.
Dream big.

Find people better than you.

He always makes the deal.
She finds conveted inside information.
He lands top meetings and befriends the opposition.
Her comments catalyze progress that proceeds company-wide change.
These folks are not your competition. Their work, their composure, their grace under fire, their successes are not your threats.
In fact, these people are your greatest allies.
People better than you offer a tremendous opportunity. They are resources to help you up your game:

  • Their excellence can challenge you to learn the tools and techniques you need.
  • Their greatness can inspire you to ask difficult questions.
  • Their wins spur self-assessment.
  • Their honesty can remind you that little steps and a slow start is what is needed until answers become clear.
  • Their bravery and fearlessness can spark your own leap into the unknown.

Extraordinary individuals provide an outside window into your own work. If bridged properly, these relationships will lead you to goals you have yet to dream of.
Forget comparisons. Use the gifts of others as a personal springboard, and align yourself with those you admire as you continue to polish your own story.
Delight in the company of those who push you.

You belong in this room.

Don’t sell yourself short.

You aren’t to be ordered about. You are here as a professional.

Everyone else is as uncertain as you are. They may even be more afraid. Yet they’ve made the decision to not let any of this get in their way. They’ve made the choice to show up and be present, regardless of insecurity and fear.

You have a choice to make.

The first few times might be a show. You may have to talk yourself into it. Once you’re there, you may whisper hurtful names to yourself — pretender, phony, fake. Ignore that voice. Slowly, gradually, that whisper will fade and be replaced with an unmistakeable assertion. A knowing, a conviction, a sense of belonging that will lead you to places you had never before considered.

Tolerate discomfort.

The journey often starts with a moment of anxiety, terror, self doubt, even despair. It’s temporary. In time, you’ll look back and see how far you’ve come. The decision to put yourself in the game will become easier, and the unknown will appear less of a threat.

Accept the invitation.

Claim your space. Believe that you can hold your own. Ask questions that can’t be avoided. Demonstrate why you must be reckoned with.

You must show up.

If you’re not in the room, we can’t listen, we can’t watch your magic, and you won’t get any better. Tell us — show us — why should we stop here, with you, and not continue on.

The magic of introductions

If you’ve been the recipient of a polished introduction, you’ve probably failed to recognize its subtle magic. An introduction is a moment of alchemy; part ceremonious, part craft, part prologue. It’s quick, seemingly effortless, and gracefully leads you into an engaging discussion. In the blink of an eye, you’re feeling confident, interesting, interested, and at ease.

A savvy intro builds a bridge between two strangers and shows them a path worth exploring. Most people know how to introduce. Few people know how to turn an introduction into magic.

Improve your next introduction with these 5 easy tips:

1. Do your research.

Know who you are connecting and why. Your familiarity with both parties gives you the upper hand. Use this knowledge to help strangers find common ground.

2. Make it interesting.

Add flavor and insert facts that raise eyebrows. It’s difficult to remember names, but providing a memorable story or colorful detail creates a current for conversation to sail upon.

3. Be smart.

Most people have a gaggle of items running through their mind at any given moment. Your introduction should make it easier for two strangers to engage, not more difficult. Be explicit, direct, and clearly state the intention behind your introduction.

4. Build a platform.

Your introduction sets the tone for conversation to follow. Help those who are meeting each other for the first time enter a comfortable, balanced space. By speaking confidently, clearly, and warmly, you’ll create an environment that’s prime for establishing rapport.

5. Exit gracefully.

Sometimes an introduction is so fantastically successful, you’re doing a disservice by sticking around. Other times, two individuals might struggle to get conversation off the ground. Tune into what’s needed for genuine connection — and know when to leave.