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Tag: confidence

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Some people live on the edge of what’s possible. They defy expectations and buck norms.
Some people follow what has come before. They do what they are told and stay in line.
Some people wander aimlessly. They dream about “what if” and believe success finds the lucky. They attribute greatness to others, failing to see it in themselves.
The difference lies in the acknowledgement of your worth, the realization of your strengths, confidence in your unique talents (for nobody does it quite like you), and the conversion of belief into action.

Pick yours.

Disappointing relationships? It could be you.

I often hear the following:

  • My relationships aren’t fulfilling.
  • I’m not meeting the right people.
  • I’m not as connected as I’d like to be.
  • My employees don’t respect me.
  • My team isn’t as close as when we first began.
  • I’m not introduced in the way that I’d like.
  • I can’t find people who share my interests.

It’s easy to place the blame on outside factors and fault something external, something beyond our control — a difficult situation, a partner’s deficit, the inability of a client to clearly communicate. The challenging route is an active one, requiring self-discipline and honest assessment. For example:

  • How do I represent myself across different areas of my life (to friends, acquaintances, strangers, colleagues, my family)?
  • Are the activities I participate in an accurate representation of my innermost dreams and ambitions?
  • Do I frequent similar kinds of situations expecting different results?
  • Am I investing time and intention to create meaningful relationships?
  • Do I carefully and thoughtfully communicate with others?

Self-analysis can be trying, confusing, and difficult to navigate; however, it is an essential step in identifying the roles we create in our lives.
How do you contribute to common perceptions of your character and personality? What behaviors do you repeat that fail to serve you in your most valued personal and professional relationships?
Most often, the gate towards fulfilling, meaningful connection begins with you.

7 objections to overcome

  1. You’re not qualified.
  2. You don’t have the experience.
  3. You’re not connected.
  4. You haven’t done this before.
  5. This will require all of your time.
  6. You don’t have the resources.
  7. It’s out of your league.

You’ll hear all sorts of objections. You get to decide if you’re going to listen.

Develop responses you can quickly and easily remember. You’ll need rebuttals you can use for yourself and for the world.

20 questions to ask as you enter a new year

They work best if you’re honest:

  1. Am I holding onto any beliefs that aren’t serving me?
  2. What do I want to learn this year?
  3. Have I set any long-term goals?
  4. Are my daily decisions setting me up for success?
  5. Do my present priorities accurately reflect my innermost dreams and desires?
  6. Is my work fulfilling my creative desires?
  7. Am I creating time to pursue outside interests?
  8. Do I regularly allow myself to dream?
  9. Is there a specific topic I can learn more about that will help advance my career?
  10. Have I surrounded myself with people who can help me achieve my goals (and encourage me to get there)?
  11. Are my personal relationships fulfilling?
  12. How do I want to be introduced when meeting strangers?
  13. Do I take an active interest in my health?
  14. How can I regularly create a supportive, positive environment for myself?
  15. What lessons have I learned from past failures and mistakes?
  16. What decisions have I made that that support my belief in my own aptitude?
  17. Do I believe that I have art/work/products that will benefit the world?
  18. Am I becoming more of the person I hope to be?
  19. What is preventing me from change?
  20. How can I start today?

your dream job is on your desk

What if someone told you that you missed the boat? That the golden ticket to a beautiful home, a happy heart, and an adventurous life was in your back pocket?

What would happen if your phone rang and your boss declared you an asset to the company? If the grocery store clerk looked straight into your eyes and called you a visionary?

What if you found out that “perfect moment” you’ve been waiting for already happened?

What if…

It’s time to find out.

I’ve designed a new offering — part seminar, mentoring circle, book club, networking accelerator, an experience like no other — to challenge you to think beyond “what if” and start venturing into this is it. The first session begins after the holiday season, so you can launch your dreams and your life in a whole new way in 2013.

Learn more about the why and the what here.

9 reasons to network (the practice of meeting people)

The term networking sends shivers up my spine. I cringe when I think of networking events where people pass out business cards like Halloween candy and anxiously look around the room to see who’s there. Conversations seem forced, and I end up answering the same routine questions throughout the evening. Network sounds anything but personal, human, warm, or meaningful to me.

So let’s call a spade a spade. Networking is really the practice of meeting people. As with any practice, you get better at it the more you do it. Some people have a natural talent for it; others require a bit more effort.

When I first started organizing dinners, I often faced a common question:

“Why should I attend a dinner with strangers when I barely have time to see my friends / colleagues / spouse / Aunt Betty?”

For those of you who don’t have the luxury of pondering the benefits of human interaction, I’m happy to provide a few reasons why meeting new people is good for you, your business, and your future.

1. Variety. The spice of life. By placing yourself in new situations, you’re able to meet different kinds of people, expand your circle, and broaden your knowledge of yourself and the world around you.

2. Business. Networking can yield a higher probability of referral-based business. If your sink is broken, would you rather hire a friend’s friend or a random name out of a search directory? Establishing personal relationships with those who can recommend your services is invaluable.

3. Opportunities. New gigs, client leads, partnerships, mentors, job opportunities. The options available to you are yours for the taking.  Obviously, you’ll want to make sure you strategically choose which routes to pursue based upon your own needs and values; it’s just a matter of saying “Yes, please.”

4. Connections. Let’s be honest: it really is who you know. If a position opens or a consultant is needed, the names that go into the hat are ones that can be vouched for. You don’t need me to tell you how many success stories have started with “I know a guy…”

5. Self-growth and development. It takes guts to put yourself in new situations and strike up conversations. It’s easy to be around the same people and talk about the same things. Be different. You never know what you’ll learn. If you’re willing to put yourself out there, you may find yourself with a group of people who can hold you accountable as you reach your goals.

6. Friends. Companionship, someone to show you new places, tell you about the latest fundraiser. No man is an island. I’m of the belief that our needs change throughout our life span, and different people can answer different needs at different times. For that reason, you can never have too many friends.

7. Communication. Introductions force you to analyze and succinctly communicate who you are and what you do. Meeting strangers can help you polish your image and get clear about what you want and the things you enjoy. Not sure? Notice the types of people you’re drawn to. The conversations you most enjoy can tell you a lot about yourself if you’re willing to look.

8. Encouragement. Most people want you to succeed. Sometimes, it’s easier to present struggles to people who are “less invested” in your world. Add more folks to cheer in your corner. Strangers can yield surprisingly positive results.

9. Excitement. If you’ve been to a really good party, you know. It’s fun, and you want more. If you haven’t found yourself in this kind of situation, look for it.

Practice meeting people when and where you can.

“The more you practice, the more you can, the more you want to, the more you enjoy it, the less it tires you.” —Robert A. Heinlein