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Tag: communication

5 ways to be a great manager

Managing people is hard. I think this is why there are so many bad bosses. Now that I’m leading a team of my own, I’ve realized how much skill goes into becoming a great manager.

While leadership traits may come naturally to some, managers can make the effort to create cohesive, hardworking teams and establish workplaces filled with satisfied employees.

Leaders are made, they are not born. They are made by hard effort, which is the price which all of us must pay to achieve any goal that is worthwhile. -Vince Lombardi

My top 5 tips for successful managerial roles:

1. Great managers find out what makes a person tick. Instead of hiring for a position and letting an individual fend for themselves, a good manager asks questions, learns about the person’s history and experience to determine what motivates that person to do their best work.

2. Great managers are like social workers. They not only consider the work environment, but they consider their employees’ home and personal life, too. If a worker consistently shows up late for work, a bad manager is quick to fire; however, a good manager asks questions to figure out the problem and address underlying difficulties.

3. Great managers aren’t afraid to shuffle positions and redefine roles. Sometimes you hire someone who isn’t a fit for the duties you need performed, but you discover they excel in other ways. A great manager spots talent and builds an environment to cultivate it.

4. Great managers make employees feel good. Employees want to feel valued and part of a team. Every worker wants to be respected and utilized. Using rewards and incentives and delegating responsibility, great managers create team cohesion and satisfaction among team members.

5. Great managers exhibit the skills and behaviors they hope their employees display. Communication is open, direct and straight forward. Skilled leaders observe and take time to respond to situations instead of reacting to circumstance. They display kindness, fairness and enthusiasm. They ask questions if they don’t know.

It is better to earn a high salary or be happy?

This is one of the questions I ask students as part of a broader English speaking exercise. “Do you think it is better to earn a high salary or be happy in your job?”
A pause always follows and eyes dart around the room before landing on empty notebooks. I give students a few moments to process before we begin.
Many friends and colleagues in America are on the quest to find work that is both meaningful and fulfilling, regardless of pay. My own answer is obvious by the lifestyle I’ve chosen. However, for eight out of ten of my students here in Nepal, the answer is a different one. “It is better to earn a high salary.”
Various reasons follow; respect in community, less worry, the ability to travel, family responsibilities. As one student answered, “I come from poor family, and I need to take care of them.”
Which has me thinking, is job satisfaction a luxury problem?
How fortunate are we who get to choose our work! And to those who have learned how to build their own course, through freelancing and entrepreneurship, how grateful we must be for the opportunity to play by our own rules!
It is our responsibility to make sure everyone can answer this question individually, not from a place of need and necessity, but from a place of passion and thoughtful consideration. Our schools need to be filled with teachers who show students how to find the loopholes.
If you’re interested in supporting this kind of leadership and education in Nepal, kindly do so here.

Being human

Recently I was rejected. I spent a lot of time crafting the perfect letter, re-writing and re-reading and editing the hell out of my argument to compose a convincing, logical, matter-of-fact and to the point submission. I sent in my proposal confidently. The rejection was prompt, and, of course, it stung.

I received a phone call several days later. “You have to explain why YOU want this,” the man instructed, “You have to say why YOU, not anyone else. They didn’t buy it.” I removed too much humanity from my writing, and the panel wasn’t pleased. They didn’t want perfect. They weren’t looking for politically or grammatically correct. They wanted the messy version: gritty, personal, detailed. They wanted human.

I submitted a second letter, this time writing for a friend. I wrote truthfully, about relationships and desire. I mentioned insecurities and inserted myself back onto the page. It worked.

Panels, bosses, review boards and government agencies — yes, they have a pulse, too. This is the place where we connect, where we can build bridges, where we can learn from each other and help ease our suffering.

Let’s not forget our where our commonalities lie. Our hearts beat the same.

10 essentials for the modern world

1. You have to make time for your goals otherwise they won’t happen.

2. You have to recognize where you’ve come from in order to have the endurance to keep going.

3. You have to have the right team around you to get it all done.

4. You have to strive to do work that speak for itself. Let others do the talking for you.

5. You have to know in your heart the effort you’ve put forth. Ignore the naysayers.

6. You have to prioritize your health and body, for it is the machine you will be using for years to come.

7. You have to take time to rest and be still. Your machine needs regular recharging and reprogramming.

8. You have to acknowledge who and what has encouraged you. Gratitude will keep you strong in the darkest moments.

9. You have to place yourself near nature from time to time to remind yourself of the impermanence and magnitude of all things.

10. You have to ignore the rules others set for themselves (and for you). Make your own.

Today’s opportunity

Everyone is busy and tired. Even with “nothing” to do, people still find reasons to worry. Stress is a worldwide experience, but our response differs. Consider an interview or an ESL speaking test; everyone is nervous, it’s how you’re able to manage your anxiety to perform.
We’re all hurting. Relationships disappoint, jobs are tiresome, families demand. Whether you’re in the top income bracket or the lowest, money is always an issue.
You have a choice today, a unique opportunity. It does’t need to involve a fundraiser or a charity or a huge demonstration, although it might. It’s simple: alleviate another’s pain.
Is there a kind word you can say? A message you can send? A smile? A gesture? Could you be a little more patient, more loving, more understanding towards someone else’s circumstance? Can you manage your anger, that embarrassing knee-jerk response and see the situation from a different angle? Can you listen?

The magic of community (why dinners work)

“Wow! Truly special, wonderful conversations, learned about others, shared a lot, philosophized, laughed, so much fun. I’d love to do it again.” Another positive email from an enchanted dinner attendee.

You carry a unique story. When placed in a room with others, a collective energy forms. Add thought-provoking questions, topics that strip away pretense and ego, and humanity and commonalities emerge. Minds are sparked. Hearts are lit on fire.

I see the greatest momentum coming from those who recognize it isn’t just them. They recognize we’re in this together; we can encourage each another to create, explore, to make a dent in the world. Even when tragedy strikes, communities can rise up and build. Small moments — quiet dinners, smiles on a train, random acts of kindness — are collectively powerful.

Gestalt Theory claims the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. But it’s up to you to hold up your end of the deal.