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Tag: choices

11 ways to “pick yourself”

Seth Godin encourages us to stop waiting for that call, the publisher, that big chance, the label. We’re at a place in history where opportunities to put ourselves into the game abound. We simply must choose to play.
But let’s get real. It isn’t always easy to find a straight line from Point A to Point B. The journey is often a winding one, filled with ups and downs, frustration and enthusiasm, celebrations of triumph and moments of despair. We see the Amanda Palmers and the Jerry Weintraubs and place them in a category separate from ourselves. They have more talent. I couldn’t do what she did. I have a family to support. He has all the right connections. She had nothing to lose. We come up with excuses upon excuses, ultimately scaring ourselves away from plausible outcomes. It’s easier to toe the mark, be complacent, play it safe.
For those wanting to “pick yourself,” it can be challenging to know where to begin. Leaping from a set job description with specific duties to a blank slate in which you create your own career path seems daunting to even the most entrepreneurial among us. (Hint: running your own show rarely happens over night.)
You may be clocking hours at a 9am-5pm and fantasizing of a life in which your product/service/offering/business/time/art/talent is all your own. Give your dreams a chance. Here are 11 simple ideas to help you move in the direction of picking yourself.

  1. Write. Set aside time to ask questions, dream, think big. Put your phone on silent and set an alarm twenty minutes out.
  2. Find a mentor. Schedule a fifteen minute phone call with someone you admire. Ask about their daily schedule, where they find inspiration, what keeps them motivated. Thank them for their time.
  3. Walk. I call them Creative Walks. Go outside for forty minutes. Do not bring your phone, but do bring paper and a pen. Let your mind wander. The best ideas rarely happen when you’re sitting at a desk.
  4. Become an impresario. Organize an after-work meetup or a social gathering. Invite speakers who can add value to your project and excite your team. Orchestrate a potluck and recruit guests to moderate discussion.
  5. Contribute. Challenge yourself to speak up in your next meeting. Pose a provocative question or make an unnoticed observation. Actively participate.
  6. Be an intrapreneur. Look for a project within your company. Has no one addressed company culture? Is there an unmet need? An open opportunity?
  7. Pitch yourself. That thing you’ve always wanted to start/produce/make? Sell yourself on it.
  8. Lunch and learn. Have lunch with a colleague you don’t know very well. Seek to understand their work and job functions. Find out which projects excite them.
  9. Surprise someone. A colleague, a partner, a parent. Call them out of the blue for no particular reason, leave a card for them to discover, gift them with something thoughtful. Add unexpected meaning to their day.
  10. Book a vacation. You don’t have to spend a fortune. Go away for the weekend. Plan a day trip. Take a tent to the mountains. Break from your day-to-day and surround yourself with something different.
  11. Write a letter to your hero. Compose a letter to your role model, the person whose life you most admire. You don’t have to send it; use it as an exercise to more clearly define your wants and desires. Or send it and see what happens.

Don’t wait. Pick yourself. Today.

Sometimes the best decision is the wrong one.

We’re bombarded with decisions.

Each day we’re faced with a record number of choices. From seemingly insignificant deliberations:

  • what to eat
  • what to wear
  • calendar scheduling
  • whether to walk or bike
  • branded or generic
  • what gifts to buy

to potentially life altering dilemmas:

  • which job to accept
  • what school to attend
  • who to marry
  • stock investments
  • starting a business
  • having children

It’s no wonder folks shy away from concrete decisions. They’re afraid. The bitterness of failure can paralyze even the most steeled among us. We all want to find the best path and make choices leading to our happiness and success, but the pressure to do so becomes burdensome. As a result, we get in our own way, stunt our growth, and eliminate perfectly good opportunities.

Realize any decision can be a good one, and the fear of making a bad choice subsides.

Wrong decisions can provide valuable information about your next best move. If you are willing to observe and take note of your experience and emotional response, most “mistakes” offer beneficial teaching moments.

Give yourself permission to make wrong decisions.

Growth and advancement requires some measure of commitment, risk, and fearlessness. If you can remove labels and take pressure off each decision, you’ll be able to access more and gain from each experience. Refuse to compromise for an abridged version; focus your vision on long-term growth instead.

10 questions to the best version of yourself

  1. Are you surrounded by people who encourage you to step up your game?
  2. Does your work excite you?
  3. Do your daily priorities align with your grander visions and dreams?
  4. What do you gravitate towards during unscheduled time?
  5. Have you set subgoals that tee you up for greater success?
  6. Do you schedule time each day to recharge and create?
  7. Have you written your dream list?
  8. Do you actively step outside of your comfort zone and seek adventure?
  9. Do you scare yourself regularly?
  10. Are you proud of the story you tell? (Is it positive or discouraging?)

Daily choices

The choices we make impact much more than our day:

  • conversations we have
  • magazines we read
  • apps we open
  • moments we check Facebook
  • meetings we participate in
  • time we set aside to create
  • phone calls we answer
  • emails we send
  • the moment we power off
  • the times we say no

Set priorities with care. They influence your destiny.

You belong in this room.

Don’t sell yourself short.

You aren’t to be ordered about. You are here as a professional.

Everyone else is as uncertain as you are. They may even be more afraid. Yet they’ve made the decision to not let any of this get in their way. They’ve made the choice to show up and be present, regardless of insecurity and fear.

You have a choice to make.

The first few times might be a show. You may have to talk yourself into it. Once you’re there, you may whisper hurtful names to yourself — pretender, phony, fake. Ignore that voice. Slowly, gradually, that whisper will fade and be replaced with an unmistakeable assertion. A knowing, a conviction, a sense of belonging that will lead you to places you had never before considered.

Tolerate discomfort.

The journey often starts with a moment of anxiety, terror, self doubt, even despair. It’s temporary. In time, you’ll look back and see how far you’ve come. The decision to put yourself in the game will become easier, and the unknown will appear less of a threat.

Accept the invitation.

Claim your space. Believe that you can hold your own. Ask questions that can’t be avoided. Demonstrate why you must be reckoned with.

You must show up.

If you’re not in the room, we can’t listen, we can’t watch your magic, and you won’t get any better. Tell us — show us — why should we stop here, with you, and not continue on.

Perseverance wins

We’re faced with more choices than ever before. With relative ease, we buy new products, find new partners, reroute our goals. We’re impatient and easily swayed.

Yet success doesn’t always land in the hands of the most skilled. The winners are those who push through, stay the course, fall down, and get back up — again and again and again.

Commit to something. Focus your vision and keep going.