Assemble your Dream Team

March 7, 2013June 17, 2021

The company you keep can be a single-handed propelling force in your life. With the right team of people by your side, you can maximize your potential and surpass both professional and personal goals.
Assemble your own Dream Team by looking for these key players:
The Mentor – Someone who’s been there. This is a person you respect and admire. They remind you to look at the big picture. You see their life and think “That’s what I want.”

An Advisee – A person you can mentor. They are eager to learn from you and respect your work. Your willingness to teach them and spend time with them affirms your own knowledge and skills, even reminding you where you’ve come from and the lessons you’ve learned along the way.
Your Advocate – No matter what circumstance you find yourself in, you need someone who fights for you and honors what you stand for.
An Equal – A colleague or friend who is in your same boat. You challenge each other to become the best you can possibly be. Compare notes, support each other, get competitive when it’s beneficial.
A Neutral – Someone with no direct investment in your life or work. This is a person who can provide an outside perspective when needed.
The Wildcard – The Wildcard is just that — wild. This person is in an industry completely different than yours. They keep you on your toes and expose you to new experiences and people. Things are never boring when they are around.
Supporting Stars: You need at least one or two people who can support your work and help you prioritize the bigger picture. These are folks you feel comfortable delegating work to, individuals you trust when you need to head out of town.
Common traits found in each key player:

passion
vulnerability
inspiration
communication skills
curiosity and wonder
sense of adventure
excitement
joy
authenticity
trustworthiness

The people surrounding you can make the difference between pushing beyond your limits and settling for less. Find those who push you.

man and woman sitting on chair in front of table with food

A free program

February 26, 2013

If you’ve felt it, you know magic happens when the right people enter a space.

Sometimes it’s serendipity; most of the time there’s a driving force.

I want to encourage you to take part in what Seth Godin has dubbed the Connection Economy — to use your most meaningful relationships to inspire you to create art, contribute to your community, and nourish the connections in your own life.

Deepen the connections in your world and start conversations that matter.

I’m thrilled by the prospect of sharing my passion and work. The capacity for what can happen when the right people come together is unlimited and largely untapped. Call this six-week program whatever you want: a book club, a group, an experiment, an adventure.

There are people in your world who need to meet.

Your efforts to organize this program may change someone’s life, but it’s up to you to make it happen. There are people out there who are stuck (as you may have discovered, paths are rarely straight and laid out). Be present and challenge each other with kindness and care.

We all have something unique to share. Let’s help each other do the tough work.

Questions? Successes? Let me know how it goes.

Step 1. Form a group.

Sure, you can do this alone. But a group offers support, accountability, and the ability to help you up your game. You want people who can call you out, people who can serve as your cohort and personal network as you advance your ideas forward. Your group is your sounding board, letting you know when you’re on track and gently nudging you when you’re off.

It doesn’t matter how many are in your group; it could be one other person or four. Call up a few friends and send out emails, “Will you try something new with me?”

Step 2. Time and place.

Face time can’t be substituted. Choose one location and meet consistently, each week. Settle on the details and commit. Six weeks. No excuses.

Respect everyone’s time. Everyone is busy. Make each other a priority.

Step 3. Finalize your reading list.

I’ve listed several books for you to use as a starting block. Recommended, but by no means required. If you have a book that has been especially influential to you, use that one instead.

Sample book list:
Linchpin
Poke the Box workbook
Superconnect
Business Model Generation
E Myth Revisited
4 Hour Work Week
Creatively Independent
Make Your Idea Matter
Host an unforgettable dinner party

Step 4: Homework (Projects & Exercises):

The activities suggested are designed to get you out of your comfort zone, inspire you, and reinforce what you’re reading. If you feel inclined to add your own twist, please do.

Most importantly, set aside time to make writing a priority. I’ve listed a few prompts to encourage you and provide creative direction. Again, use what is helpful and improve what isn’t. Not everything will work for everyone.

Week 1

Reading: Bernadette Jiwa’s Make Your Idea Matter
Project: Go find a journal that inspires you. Buy it from that indie book store you’ve always wanted to check out, look for something inspiring while you’re waiting in line, make it yourself.
Writing exercise: Set your alarm for ten minutes. Choose one:

Imagine your dream life. Envision everything it entails. Now write. It doesn’t need to be complete sentences or thoughts, words are fine.
Ask questions. Write them down, every question you can think of. They don’t need to make sense. You don’t need to have the answers. Tangential is fine. Just ask.

Discuss: What is the difference between dreaming and storytelling? Do you set aside time to create and dream? What stories do you tell yourself? To others?

Week 2

Reading: Tim Ferriss’ 4 Hour Work Week
Project: Do something new this week. Cook dinner with veggies from the local market. Sign up for a class. Explore a new neighborhood. Get lost in a library.
Writing exercise: If you could do anything, anywhere, what would it be?

Discuss: How do you define work/life balance? Is a distinction necessary?

Week 3

Reading: Seth Godin’s Poke the Box workbook
Project: Print out the workbook. Plan thirty minutes of uninterrupted time to complete.
Writing exercise: Notice any areas of hesitation while you’re completing the workbook. Is there a particular topic that seems more challenging than others?

Discuss: What obstacles stop you from shipping? How are you getting in your own way?

Week 4

Reading: Project Exponential’s Host an unforgettable dinner party
Project: Schedule a lunch date or host a dinner party.
Writing exercise: Set your alarm for ten minutes. Choose one:

What are the traits you most admire in others? What are the traits you’re most proud of?
Assemble an imaginary Dream Team. You get five players. Who do you choose? What skills do they offer?

Discuss: Talk about how teams are formed and what kind of environments contribute to their growth. What kind of people belong on your Dream Team? Who inspires you?

Week 5

Reading: Jess Pillmores’s Creatively Independent
Project: Challenge yourself to write the first draft of your very own ebook.
Writing exercise: Consider the uniqueness that you, and only you, bring to your work, your relationships, your family. What separates you from competition? What is that one trait that singles you out?

Discuss: How do you stay inspired while working on a big [exhausting] project? What tricks and techniques have you found to be most helpful when setting big goals?

Week 6

Reading: E Myth Revisited and/or Business Model Generation
Project: Brainstorm how you might turn $10 into $100.
Writing exercise: Write out a sample business plan. What would you do if you had no excuses, no responsibilities? Journey back to the days of mowing lawns, selling lemonade, babysitting. What would change if today was your last day at your current job?

Discuss: Would things be different if you consistently set aside time to write, dream, explore, learn?

Action

February 19, 2013June 17, 2021

One word separates problems from solutions.

It is possible to witness a situation and do nothing.

Or you can let it move you, think of a way to change it, make it better, and improve it from the way you found it.

Never ever

February 14, 2013June 19, 2021

You may never see the writing on the wall.
You may never feel one-hundred-percent.
You may never hear, “Yes, you are right.”
You may never know if there was any other way.

**Will this stop you from ever?**

7 objections to overcome

January 24, 2013June 17, 2021

You’re not qualified.
You don’t have the experience.
You’re not connected.
You haven’t done this before.
This will require all of your time.
You don’t have the resources.
It’s out of your league.

You’ll hear all sorts of objections. You get to decide if you’re going to listen.

Develop responses you can quickly and easily remember. You’ll need rebuttals you can use for yourself and for the world.

Get what you want by working backwards

January 8, 2013June 17, 2021

Big Goals — the ones worth mentioning — typically fall into one of two categories:

1. You really, really want something.

Big Goal: I want to … travel around the world, be the company’s top earner, find a fulfilling relationship, double my savings account, change careers.

2. You want to change your behavior.

Big Goal: I am going to … lose weight, eat mindfully, stop smoking, be independent, make confident decisions, become more organized.

Big Goals sound daunting because they’re not easy (if it sounds easy, it probably isn’t a Big Goal). These kinds of goals often entail major life changes — career, relationship, health — and require concentrated focus and energy.

Lately, many of my meetings have involved some sort of goal setting tirade: how to set goals, frustration with achieving them, fear of failing, uncertainty. Since my days working as a probation officer, I’ve encouraged people to set Big Goals, ones that are both lofty and achievable. The trick to success?

Work backwards.

This may sound counterintuitive, but it works.
After you’ve identified and set your Big Goal(s), you must plan smaller, manageable subgoals that point you in the direction of your identified finish line.

Big Goal: I am going to get fit.

subgoal: I am going to start a food diary.

subgoal: I will pack lunch twice this week.

subgoal: I am going to explore different forms of exercise and find what I enjoy.

subgoal: I am going to schedule workouts into my calendar.

etc.

It’s not enough to write your dream on a board and walk away. Your chances of accomplishing Big Goals proportionally increase with the planning and thought you put into your game plan. Subgoals are essential if you’re looking to knock it out of the park.
Set periodic check-in reminders to help you assess whether you are on track. Think of it as a training plan: no marathoner wills himself past the finish line. Successful race days are the result of many mini-runs, planned efforts set with an end result in mind. There’s a reason step-by-step guides work. They take complex processes and break them down into approachable actions.